Member-only story
When Isolation Is Actually Protection
Isolation gets a bad rap; sometimes it’s trying to save you
“I hate everyone and everything. Okay… I don’t really mean that. It’s just the thought of going anywhere or seeing anyone feels so overwhelming.”
I nodded in agreement as my client, Whitney, recounted her past week to me. We’d been working together for about three months in which time she’d experienced three major deaths—her father, her dear friend, and her longtime healthcare provider. In just three short months, she‘d gone from living a life of constant caregiving for her aging father and interacting regularly with friends and family to spending most of her time at home in front of the television, occasionally getting up to walk her dog or take a shower. Sure, family and friends were checking in intermittently, but for the most part, her primary support structures had literally died, leaving her alone and facing a trifecta of griefs.
On this particular call, it seemed as if Whitney was oscillating between two options: 1) engage with the world writ large, which seemed daunting and draining or 2) shut out the world entirely, which seemed lonely and stagnant.
I asked her what she really wanted to do. She said, “Right now, I just want to sit on my couch alone and cry and sleep.” I sensed a bit of judgment in…
